Ok, so I know I am American, and I lived here for 26 years before going to SA, but having lived there for 13 years and it being the ONLY place I have raised my kids, it sort of feels like that is the base of my beliefs in raising kids.
Yesterday was the kids first day at their new school, and they did wonderfully! Both teachers gave reports that they adjusted well and had a great day and neither cried at all. Well they have been in school since they were 4 months old so it must feel normal to be in a school. With the little one a note comes home to tell me how many times her nappie (diaper) was changed and how she ate, her mood and any notes from the teacher. They don't have books like we used at Snuggles where I could also send info to the teacher, so I stopped in to chat to the teacher about the note she left for me on O's sheet. It said that O would need hard soled shoes to play outside in so the pebbles didn't hurt her feet. I asked Julian to go with me to make sure that I didn't sound hard or unreasonable because as those that know me know, I like to discuss things, I like to go through different ideas and I like to understand the thinking of the other person and take what I can and come to an agreement. Whether it is me moving to that point of view totally, them moving to mine, or a meet in the middle kind of thing, it is all good and everyone involved in raising my children have a new outlook. Well, I started to speak to the teacher and she was quite open to discussing, I asked if I could see the pebbles that she was concerned about and we spoke about how it's just on the cement where the pebbles get scattered that it is in an issue etc...Then the teacher over the divider - well she is the office assistant that was helping out in that class this morning. She pipes up that it is 'state law that they have tennis shoes in the classroom in case something falls on her feet it will bruise them' And of course this was done in that very loud very condescending voice that people have when they believe they are right and not willing to have another point of view given. At this, my claws might have reared their ugly little heads a bit more than I wanted. I have certain beliefs in how MY children are raised. I am old fashioned in many respects and I do not judge other parents for how they wish to raise their kids. We are all doing what we feel to be right and doing it the best we can. However, these are MY kids and therefore I have a say in how they are raised. So I slowly turned my head to this loud woman and said in quite a clear precise (as the exhubby would say I enunciated my syllables) way that it has been proven in independent studies that hard soled shoes do not allow for the proper development of their feet and that my son wore these shoes for the first two years of his life and I assured her that he never acquired bruising on his feet at his previous nursery school.
I just feel frustrated that here in the 'land of the free' the government or some office clerk wants to tell me an unsubstantiated requirement for my child. No not here, no thank you. I will have a look for other shoes, perhaps a very soft harder sole than the shoo shoes she has, but truly this is going to take some getting use to on my part. I need to figure out a way to communicate with other people here as well that will not be considered offensive when I want to gain a better understanding of some rule or law.
....And ok perhaps I am a bit defensive on this too...perhaps...I am maybe feeling a bit superior to the sheep herded masses here that believe what they are told and not do their own research or question the validity behind the 'rules' given to them....perhaps I am a lot less American than I thought...and a bit more South African than I planned....
I miss Granny...and Snuggles....
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